The Outcast
So ... freedom suits me nicely. I've been hanging around mostly; Ema doesn't like the way I've been talking lately. She thinks it's all from the movies ... heh heh.
I had a revelation today right at the beginning of Pirkei Avos, a class difficult to get through to begin with: I do not belong in a Bais Yaakov school. I don't fit in, I don't think that way, and I don't idolize the same people. Any suggestions? Ema will never let me go to the Academy. Help me!
posted by Lela Harbinger at 10:44 PM
2 Comments:
stop living for ema. she has her own life and you're not responsible for it. time to learn how to take risks, to venture things, like other people's love. otherwise how will you become a larger container for yourself? Exceed limits. Even at the cost of hurting and getting hurt. life is intense and thorny. Don't be a victim of it. Stand up to it and match it move for move. (of course this is harder when you're living under someone else's regime... but perhaps a revolution is necessary?)
It's so cool to hear you say the same things I said to myself, and the same things I felt for so long!
Yes, exactly! You do not belong in a bais yaakov! Do you remember me saying that about myself, and later on about you?
I don't know that you would belong in ICJA, though. There are losses and gains in both places, that's something I've learned. It is very tough being somewhere you know so blatantly you don't belong in. And saying "this year is almost over, and then only one left" doesn't do a thing. My only comfort to you, liege, is to tell you that it gets much easier to deal with. Much. hang in there for a few more weeks, I miss you so much and can't wait to see you!
Whatever you do or don't do next year in terms of student service, it will be much easier, and, you will dominate the school as a senior!
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