Disbelief

I have lived for other people for so long ... I still do, and I probably will for a long time to come. But just for now, for this time, I wish I was more selfish. I wish I could care about myself as much as I do about other people, because then I could tell myself that I did the right thing and I would believe it. I could tell myself he'll get over it and I wouldn't be wishing it had happened the other way around. I still can't believe I did it ...